Kids In America
by CH Ming Diablo
Summary: The Losties are in High school.. And they take a feild trip to America! Insanity ensues...
1. Prologue

**This is my first LOST fanfiction! Yay! So yeah... Nothing belongs to me... blah blah blah... read and review... blah blah blah... this is only the prologue so the next chapters will be way longer. **

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"Now settle down children," a stick-skinny teacher glared at the majority of the kids riding the bus. They were on a field trip to America, and on their way to the airport.

"What are we going to America for anyway," a girl with long brown hair asked her seatmate, another girl with wavy blonde hair. "I just came from there, I don't want to go back!"

"I know what you mean," the blonde, who's name was Claire, replied to the brunette, Kate. "Although I just came from Australia. THAT was a long plane trip."

"I'm actually exited to go to New York," a guy with long brown-blond hair named Charlie said from behind Kate. "I've never been outside of England."

"I think this whole thing is stupid," Sawyer, a boy with long blond hair said from his seat in front of the girls. "We just got to this English boarding school yesterday and already they sent us away on a field trip _overseas_. What kinds of field trips go _overseas_?"

"Northchester Boarding school's field trips, apparently," Charlie said.

"I really don't care, as long as it gets me out of schoolwork," a guy with messy brown hair who was sitting next to Charlie said. "And this trip is supposed to last for over a week!"

"_And _we get to stay in a five-star hotel," Shannon, a blonde who was sitting behind Charlie said enthusiastically. "_I _for one, can't wait."

"What, Shan, you don't want to go to New York for all the great _educational experience _you'll get from the trip?" the boy with the dark messy hair smirked at the blonde.

"Don't mess with me, Boone," she warned, flipping her hair over a shoulder.

"Oh, I'm really scared of being _slapped _to death," he said sarcastically.

"Ok, guys," Claire, always the peacemaker, said. "We're going to be together for a _long _time on this trip, so we're going to have to make an effort not to get on each other's nerves, alright?"

"Uh, I think I already succeeded in making Shannon mad," Boone said almost sheepishly. "Sorry, the rest of you."

"What?!" Shannon screeched. "No 'sorries' for me?!"

"Of course not," Boone replied matter-of-factly. "You're my stepsibling." Shannon glared at him.

"Excuse me class," the skinny teacher was back again, glaring. "We are now at the airport. Grab your luggage and follow me."

_This is going to be the most amazing trip ever, _Kate thought._ If we don't all kill each other first…_

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**Was it worth posting?! Tell me!**


	2. Chapter 1: No Coffee and Nicknames

Here's the kinda shortish chapter one! I'll try to make the others longer, I've just been MAJORLY busy!

**Chapter 1: No Coffee and Nicknames**

"Flight 815, please report to gate two," a crackly voice issued over the intercom at the Oceanic Airlines airport.

"That is our flight, children," their teacher said briskly. "Let's go."

"Finally," Sawyer grumbled. "We've been sitting in this airport forever."

"Stop whining," Kate said. "We've only been here for a little over an hour."

"There wasn't even a line at the coffee shop," Shannon said, holding a cup of steaming liquid. "So this is basically the best airport ever."

"Hey, you have coffee!"

"Yes Boone," Shannon said, exasperated. "This is what we call coffee. A wonderful thing that keeps me awake."

"I know what it is," Boone said. "But I want some… Where did you get it?"

"Over there," she said, pointing with a perfectly manicured nail. "The one that says 'Java Bob's'."

"Here, I'll come with you," Kate said. "I'd really like a pick-me-up too."

Boone and Kate quickly walked over to Java Bob's, savoring the coffee smell that was all around them.

"Ahh," Boone smiled. "Coffee."

"I'm almost asleep on my feet," Kate said with a yawn for good measure. "I'd really enjoy a latte. That'd be really good. And nice."

"And wonderful," Boone finished for her. "And what was Shannon talking about? No line? She lies!"

There was a line snaking out of Java Bob's and out into one of the terminal's waiting rooms. There was even a sign that said- "From here, 20 minute wait."

"Oh come on!" Kate groaned. "Give a girl a break!"

"Whatcha doooin," Sawyer drawled as he came to stand next to them.

"What do you think," Kate gave him a look. "We're getting c-o-f-f-e-e."

"May I stand with you in this longish line?"

"No!"

"Oh come on, Freckles!"

"Since when am I FRECKLES?" Kate yelled, startling a family with two kids.

"Since about five seconds ago," Sawyer smirked. "I thought to myself… 'Sawyer, you know what? You're gonna be extremely bored on this trip.' And then I thought… 'Yes, Sawyer, I know I am. You know what I should do? I should make up annoying nicknames for all my fellow students!' And Freckles, you were the first to get the honor of the first Sawyer-esque nickname!"

"Great," Kate muttered. She really needed some coffee, it was five-o-clock in the morning, and Sawyer was already being himself and the plane hadn't even taken off yet.

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Thanks for reading, please review!


	3. Chapter 2: Stealing and Seats

**Chapter 2: Stealing and Seats**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything except Java Bob's... Dang it.**

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"Remind me again, Freckles, HOW long have we been standing here?"

Kate sighed with exasperation. Sawyer was possibly the most annoying person she had ever met.

"For the FIFTH time, Sawyer, we've been standing here for FORTY-TWO minutes, and the line has only moved TWICE!" Kate said loudly.

"Yeah," Boone agreed. "I'm starting to think coffee wasn't a very good idea."

"Are you kidding me?" Sawyer said indignantly. "I'm standing in this line to get my coffee and I don't care if the plane leaves without me!"

"I wish it would," Kate muttered under her breath.

"What was that, Freckles?"

"Nothing, Sawyer." Kate grinned in his direction and rolled her eyes. "Love you!"

"I know you do," Sawyer said haughtily. "Everybody does."

"Yep," Kate said, still grinning. Boone looked at her in a weird way and they both started laughing silently.

"Last call for Flight 815!" the intercom crackled.

"Let's _go_, children!" the teacher yelled at the three in line for coffee. They quickly broke out of line and ran for the rest of the group, but not before Sawyer grabbed a steaming cup of coffee from a businessman.

"Hey kid, that's my coffee!" he yelled at the retreating back of Sawyer.

"Too bad!" Sawyer yelled back. To Kate and Boone he added- "I wonder why I didn't do that earlier!"

"You're gonna get arrested one day." Boone remarked dryly. Sawyer just graced him with his trademark 'Sawyer-smirk'.

The group quickly walked toward their flight gate, Sawyer sipping the steaming cup of coffee. When they arrived, he tossed it into a nearby trash can, they showed their tickets, and they boarded the plane.

"Hey," a short-haired guy walked up to Kate. "I heard we're sitting in first-class!"

"We'd better be," Shannon broke in. "After how much this boarding school cost? I'd sue if we weren't."

"I know you would," Kate said, and quickly walked away, the short-haired guy trailing after her. Shannon wasn't her favorite person to be with… And she honestly was hoping they wouldn't sit together, or even moderately near each other.

"I hope you sit next to me, Freckles," the syrupy-sweet tones of Sawyer registered in her brain.

"Go get a life, Sawyer," she said. He feigned a wounded look, but she just shook her head. "I'm in seat number A11."

"Aw, I'm in A9," he sounded genuinely disappointed to not have the opportunity to torment her for the extent of the trip.

"Hey Kate, I'm in A10, we get to sit next to each other!" Boone said, smiling.

Kate smiled back at him… This plane ride was getting better and better.

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**READ AND REVIEW!**


	4. Chapter 3: Nobody Likes Planes

**I own nothing you recognize!**

Chapter 3: Nobody Likes Planes

Boone was not having the best plane ride ever. For one thing, he had to sit with Sawyer behind him. This was not fun.

"Boone!"

"What Sawyer?!" Boone was exasperated.

"Boone!"

"What?"

"Boone!"

"What?!"

"Boone!"

"WHAT?!"

"Hi!"

"AUGH!" Boone threw his hands up in the air, waking a sleeping Kate.

"What is it?" she said, semi-concerned.

"Nothing," Boone seethed. "Just Sawyer being stupid."

"Hey! I beg to differ!"

"Just ignore him," was Kate's advice. Boone settled back in his seat and plugged in his headphones, listening to Fall Out Boy's new single.

It was gonna be a long plane ride.

XoXoXoXoXoXo

"So…" Shannon was sitting next to this guy she had never spoken to in her life. "What's your name?"

"I'm Sayid," he said, turning to face her. "You?"

"Shannon."

"Oh." Sayid turned back to his 'Arms and Weaponry' magazine, and Shannon sighed.

_Why couldn't I get paired with someone who has a decent taste in literature? _She thought. _Which means 'Teen Crush' magazine, obviously. I can't even talk about my new manicure with this guy!_

"So… What do you think of Britney's new song?" she asked, trying to make conversation.

"Britney who?" he replied. "Do you think this gun is cool?" He showed her a picture of a black gun.

"Britney who?" she was completely appalled. "Britney SPEARS! And I don't enjoy weapons of warfare!" She pointedly turned her back on him. This was a fun time.

XoXoXoXoXo

"Hi, I'm Jack."

"I'M DESMOND!"

"Why are you yelling, dude?" Jack asked. "We're in a small enclosed space with a whole bunch of people. It would be wise not to yell."

"Oh yeah…" Desmond said sheepishly, then… "ENCLOSED SPACE? LOTS OF PEOPLE? I FEEL MY CLOSTROPHOBIA KICKING IN!"

"Oh no." Jack said in a monotone. "Yippee."

XoXoXoXoXo

"Hey, Boone."

"What, Sawyer?" Boone said, exasperated.

"Hey!"

"What?"

"Hey!"

"OH no you don't." Boone said forcefully. "I am NOT getting dragged into THAT little game again."  
"But it was fun the last time we played!" Boone knew Sawyer was pouting without even looking at him.

He just sighed LOUDLY enough for Sawyer to hear and turned up the volume.

XoXoXoXoXoXo

"I think this one would look pretty on me," Shannon mumbled under her breath as she circled a denim miniskirt in her 'Teen Crush' magazine.

"I like this gun," Sayid said quietly to himself as he dog-eared the page in his 'Arms and Weaponry' magazine.

XoXoXoXoXo

Desmond was frantically sucking on an inhaler as Jack stared out the window… Hoping and praying for the plane ride to end.

"Ahhhhhhhh." Desmond said suddenly, throwing the inhaler at a random stewardess. "I feel SO much better now."

"Thank you," Jack said to the ceiling of the plane. "Maybe I can get some sleep now. Hey Desmond, are you going to sleep now?"  
"Sleep?"

"Yeah," Jack gestured to all the sleeping occupants of the plane. "It's nighttime."

"THERE'S MONSTERS UNDER MY SEAT!"

Jack started hitting his head repeatedly on the back of the seat in front of him.

It was gonna be a long night.

XoXoXoXoXoXo

**Thanks for reading, please review!**

**-CH Ming Diablo**


	5. Chapter 4: Insomnia

DISCLAIMER: I don't own LOST!

Sorry this took so long, I was away. But here it is now, enjoy!

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"Boone! Hey, Boone!"

"Huh…" Boone said sleepily. "Kate?"

"Sorry I woke you up," she said sheepishly. "But… I'm really bored." Boone checked the time on his cell phone.

"It's three thirty in the morning!" Kate cringed.

"I _said _I was sorry!"

"Hey, hey," Boone said, holding out his hands to stop her. " I never said I _minded _being woken up."

"I guess I really shouldn't have drank that Mountain Dew…" Kate grinned in the dim light of the airplane.

"I guess not," Boone smiled back at her. Kate leaned back in her seat and groaned.

"I am _so _bored!"

"Here," Boone pulled out his iPod and handed her an earbud. "I have the perfect song for you." He spun the click wheel without showing her, and then pressed 'play.' Kate laughed when she recognized the song.

"Insomniatic by Aly and Aj?" she said, still laughing. "That _is _perfect for this instance. But _why_, if I may ask, do you have them on your iPod anyway?" Boone shrugged, and Kate grabbed it from him and started scrolling through his library.

"You have Katy Perry too," she informed him. "_And _Britney Spears, you freakin' girly man!" He snatched it back from her and chose a different song.

"Iris," he said. "By the Goo Goo Dolls. Happy now?" She grinned.  
"I love this song."  
"Me too," he whispered. They listened in the quiet of the dark plane, neither of them wanting to break the silence. The song then ended, and Kate chose another one.

"Shake It by Metro Station?" Boone questioned. "Why this song?" Kate just grinned, attempting to dance in the restrictions of her plane seat. "I don't think that's exactly working out for you…"

"It's kind of fun though," she said, not stopping. Boone laughed, she looked ridiculous.

"Are you laughing at my awesome dance skills?" she questioned, hands on hips.  
"Yes," he didn't lie. "Yes I am."

"I doubt a Girly Man like yourself could do better."

"I have too much pride to start dancing in an airplane at three thirty in the morning," he said with a side glance her way. "You Psychopathic Dance Maniac."

"PDM…" she mused. "I'll take it. It's much better then _Sawyer's _nicknames for us anyway."

"What was that about me?" Both Boone and Kate flinched as Sawyer sat up in his chair.

"Uh… " Boone thought. "Nothing. Nothing at all, Sawyer."

"We were just talking about how _thoughtful _and _original _your nicknames for us are," Kate supplied, grinning back at him.

"Cool," Sawyer said suspiciously. "Another update on nicknames, I figured out that I'm gonna call the skinny blonde 'Sticks' and the dude with the shaved head 'Doc'."

"Why?"

"Well, the blonde has really skinny legs that look like sticks and the shaved head dude looks like he's a smartie and I'm guessing he wants to be something smartie like a doctor when he grows up."

"Wow," Kate said sarcastically. "Brilliant."

"And you're still Freckles, Freckles," Sawyer said with a smirk. "And I've decided to call you, 'Boy'."

"Who, _me?_" Boone said indignantly as Sawyer nodded. "Why?"

"Because you're younger then me," Sawyer said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Duh."

Suddenly Kate's stomach growled.

"Oops," she said guiltily. "I guess I'm hungry."

"Sorry," Boone said. "I only have some candy on me. Sawyer?"

"I'm also starving," Sawyer said. "And also flat broke with money and food."

"Great," Kate groaned. "Just great."

"But I know a way we can get food," Sawyer said, grinning slightly. "It might be a bit illegal though…"

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Ooh, what's Sawyer gonna come up with now? R&R and maybe I'll tell you!

-CH Ming Diablo


	6. Chapter 5: Illegalness in the Galley

**Ok, so I'm like really sorry and stuff about not updating this story.... But here you go!**

**I got this idea from a PM from Hyperactive Lioness!**

**Disclaimer: I DON'T OWN LOST.**

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**Chapter Five: Illegalness in the Galley**

"What are you talking about, Sawyer?" Boone asked suspiciously. "I really don't feel like going to jail in my early teenage years."

"Well..." Sawyer replied. "We're on a plane..."

"Yes Sawyer! Good job!" Kate said, exasperated.

"And planes have food...."

Kate made anxious hand gestures to tell him to get a move on.

"So we just have to find out where they keep that alleged food and we can steal some and EAT IT!"

"That..." Boone sighed. "Is the most retarded plan I have ever heard."

"Oh, like you could do any better!"

"WANNA BET?!"

"BOYS!" Kate whispered as loud as she could. "Stop! Boone, you don't have to come, but I'm starving."

"Excellent," Sawyer said in a really evil-sounding voice. Kate shot Boone a pleading look that clearly said 'Please, don't leave me alone with him!'

"Fine, I'm coming." Boone said, resigned to his fate as Sawyer's jail buddy.

"Whatever suits you! Lets go get our illegalness on!"

"Wonderful." Boone and Kate deadpanned at the same time.

XoXoXo

"Shhh," Sawyer was creeping down the aisles, acting like a spy. "We can't be seen!"

"Uh, Sawyer?" Kate said. "We're not even out of the passenger spot yet, we can always pretend we're going to the bathroom." Sawyer stood up and straightened his shirt.

"Oh, well, I knew that," he said. "Just got... A little cought up in the wonder of the chase!"

_What chase? _Boone wondered.

XoXoXo

"Okay," Sawyer stopped outside of a large metal door. "Here's the galley."

"Galley? Isn't that in a ship?" Kate whispered.

"Is it?"

"SAWYER!" Boone whisper-screamed. "WE'RE IN AN AIRPLANE!"

"Oh... Gotcha."

_I never should've left the school... _Boone was regretting his decision to come on this trip every second.

_Why did I agree to come on a _mission _with Mr. Delinquent? _Kate was hitting herself mentally.

_I really hope there's cheese in the galley... _Sawyer's thoughts were occupied by none other then cheese.

Which is why none of them were prepared for what happened next.

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**DUN DUN DUN!!!! Cliffie!**

**I'm sorry for neglecting this story, I hope I'll be able to update it more frequently!**

**IF YOU HAVE READ, PLEASE REVIEW! (Or Sawyer'll come after you...)**

**-CH Ming Diablo**


	7. Chapter 6: Flashbacks of a Big Guy

**Hola, thanks to all who reviewed! I have no long and boring spiel to go on this time, you guys got off lucky.**

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own LOST! Not even Sawyer's funky Harry Potter glasses from that one episode... Which I would look awesome in... And look, here I am, going on a spiel.**

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**CHAPTER SIX: Flashbacks of a Big Guy**

_((flashback)) _

I never should've left the school... _Boone was regretting his decision to come on this trip every second._

Why did I agree to come on a _mission_ with Mr. Delinquent? _Kate was hitting herself mentally._

I really hope there's cheese in the galley... _Sawyer's thoughts were occupied by none other then cheese._

_Which is why none of them were prepared for what happened next..._

_((end flashback))_

"Um, dudes, like what are you dudes doing up from your dude-seats... Dudes?"

"HURLEY?" Kate whisper-screamed. "What are you DOING awake?" Kate had met Hurley before she stood in line for coffee. It was a very memorable experience, one that Kate would never forget.

_((flashback))_

_Kate was sitting in one of the terminal's uncomfortable chairs, waiting for the rest of the group to get their tickets, when an overweight guy walked up to her. She recognized him from one of her science classes back at school, but she never actually bothered to ask him his name._

_"'Sup?" he asked, his tone rather friendly. "Kate, right?"_

_"Yeah," she said, feeling kind of bad that he knew her name but she didn't know his. "Uh..."_

_"I'm Hurley," he said, taking another bite of the large cheese enchilada he was holding. "Well, my real name is Hugo, but everyone calls me Hurley..."_

_"That's nice," she said non-committally._

_"Want a bite of my enchilada?" Hurley asked, holding out the cheese-covered monstrosity._

_"No, not really," Kate answered, just as a big blob of enchilada fell off his plate and landed right on her lap. "...great."_

_"Oh, no prob," Hurley grabbed the enchilada blob off her lap and ate it. "Later, dude."_

_And then he walked away._

_((end flashback))_

"I was hungry," Hurley admitted. "So I came here, looking for food."

"Same here," Boone said, looking at Hurley, slightly suspicious. He thought he remembered this guy from somewhere else, and suddenly, like a ton of cheese enchiladas, it hit him. The cafeteria. First term. Last year.

_((flashback))_

_Boone was standing in the lunch line, behind a bunch of cheerleaders and in front of some drama people. As the cheerleaders were talking about the latest gossip in loud, squealy tones, and the drama people were reciting Shakespeare in ear-splitting English accents, Boone... was not enjoying his time in the lunch line. _

_Until he actually saw what they were serving for lunch. _

_"No way!" he breathed. Only once a year did they serve this dessert, and it actually happened to be Boone's favorite._

_Chocolate. Eclairs._

_He excitedly took one and placed it on his plate, next to his meatball surprise, which he wasn't actually planning on eating, anyway. He sat down at a table with some people from the basketball team, and picked up his eclair._

_It all happened in an instant. One moment he was anxiously holding the beautiful pastry, the next, he wasn't. The only thing he could remember was a large blur of red and orange plaid, and a swish of extremely curly brown hair. _

_He never really _did _catch the eclair bandit, but he had always suspected a rather large kid that was in his math class. Hurley, his name was. He had curly brown hair, and he was wearing a red and orange plaid shirt on that offending day, and after lunch he had a rather unusual ammount of eclair around his mouth._

_((end flashback))_

Hurley quickly looked away from Boone, who was giving him a quite scary stare. He expected it came from that eclair he nicked from him awhile back, but he wasn't sure.

"So you want to steal food with us?" Sawyer asked, finally.

"I don't really see it as _stealing,_" Hurley said. "I see it as taking without asking!"

"Stealing." Sawyer said. He was willing to let Hurley into their little scheme, after all, he owed the big guy one.

_((flashback))_

_"You got the stuff?" a younger Hurley asked a younger Sawyer. "Because... _I _got _my _stuff." The little Sawyer dumped a backpack full of junk food onto one of the library's tables, and the little Hurley took out a math book. _

_"Okay, I'm ready," Sawyer said._

_"Alright." Hurley opened the book. "Chapter one, understanding fractions..."_

_((two weeks later))_

_"Ford, James." _

_Little Sawyer walked up to the teacher's desk to retrieve his math test on fractions. Hurley grinned at him, reassuringly. Sawyer glanced at the grade on the top of the test, written in red ink. _

_It was a B+, the highest grade he had ever gotten in math. He looked over at Hurley, who was smiling at him. Sawyer let a quick grin flit across his face._

_((end flashback))_

"Are you guys ready?" Sawyer was poised, about to pick the lock that would let them into the kitchen.

"Let's do this thing!" Hurley, Kate and Boone said at the same time.

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**I hope you guys liked this chapter, it was a little different because it had FLASHBACKS in it, which I think are awesome! **

**READ AND REVIEW, PLEASE!**

**-CH Ming Diablo**


	8. Chapter 8: Who or What?

**Thanks to all the reviewers! You guys make my day!**

**CHAPTER EIGHT: Who or What?  
**

"Okay, who turned off the light?"

"I can't see!"

"Come on, guys!"

"Hurley, _move_!"

"I can't, dudes! I think I'm stuck!"

"I think I heard something! Shh!"

"BE QUIET!"

"Okay, who's stomach just growled?"

"I think it was mine..."

"Who's 'mine'?"

"It's Sawyer! I can't help if I'm hungry! I never should've brought you people with me! What's causing the holdup?"

"_Hurley _got stuck in the _door_, and Kate's behind him!"

"Dudes, I can't help it if they make these doors that lead into airplane-food-places WAY too small!"

"Just give him a good, hard _kick_, Kate!"

"Sawyer! I can't do THAT! That's so mean!"

"Do you _want _to get caught?!"

"Boone, you're AGREEING with him?"

"I just don't want to go to prison for stealing airplane food!"

"Once again, dudes, I don't see it as _stealing..._"

"Shut UP, Hurley!"

"No YOU shut up, Sawyer!"

"Both of you BE QUIET, I heard something again!"

"Jeez, you don't have to be so harsh!"

"Hurley, if you don't shut your mouth, I might have to come over there and do it for you."

"Oh really, Boone? What are _you _gonna do to _me_, dude? I'm like two hundred and fifty pounds and you're what, ninety-nine?"

"A hundred, last time I checked."

"Will you guys STOP discussing your weight issues? We have a bigger problem, no pun intended!"

"And what's _that_, dude?"

And just then, the light flicked on.

"_What _are you guys doing?" It was a guy from their class with long dirty blond hair, Charlie Pace. "And is that... _Hurley_? Stuck in the _door_?"

"Shut UP, dude!" Hurley whined. "Just get me outta here!"

"Okay, fine!" Charlie held up his hands in surrender. "Help me push, Kate."

"We thought you were a policeman," Boone said as the two started pushing. "Or that crazy stick lady who's supervising the trip."

"Well, I'm neither," Charlie said. "I just have one question. What're you people doing in here? I'm presuming it's illegal, 'cause you have Sawyer with you, but what, exactly, is it?"

"We're just taking some food, because we're all hungry," Sawyer stated matter-of-factly. "Want in?"

"Heck yes!" Charlie said eagerly. Any further conversation was stopped abruptly by the diversion of Hurley finally popping out of the door.

"Finally!" Boone said, and they all eagerly piled into the place where the airplane stocked its food. "Wow..."

It was filled with every good thing imaginable. Boone grabbed some Pop-Tarts, Kate piled lemonade bottles into her backpack, Charlie microwaved some leftover chicken legs, Hurley sat in the corner, unwrapping and eating numerous chocolate bars, and Sawyer was taking pies out of a refrigerator.

Suddenly...

"WHAT are YOU CHILDREN doing here?"

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**Ooh, cliffie!**

**R&R!**

**Ch Ming :)**


	9. Chapter 9: Screamy Screamness

**Hi, all you fanfiction-y people! Who read this fanfiction! :)**

**NEW CHAPTER! WOOT! **

**Disclaimer: Do I really LOOK like the type of person who owns important things like LOST?**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter Nine: Screamy Scream-ness  
**

"And I so repeat myself, WHAT in the name of CRAP are you CHILDREN doing in HERE?"

"Whoa, Shan, calm yourself down!" Boone tried to calm down his hysterical stepsibling. "We don't want another incident like _last time_, now do we?"

"Nobody's supposed to know about that!" she screetched. "And you didn't answer my question! WHY ARE YOU IN HERE, AND WHY IS PIE STUFFED DOWN SAWYER'S SHIRT!"

Sawyer tried to look innocent, and failed.

"What, I like pie!"

"We're _here_, Shannon, because we were all hungry!" Charlie said.

"So you stoop so low as to steal food from an airplane?" Shannon snorted, while, at the same time, trying to look glamorous. This also was a failure. "You people amaze me with your weirdness."

"Well, Sticks, are you going to report us, or join us?" Sawyer drawled, blueberry and apple pies smeared all over his shirt.

"I can't eat all that... _Stuff_!" Shannon shrieked, gesturing to Sawyer's pie-covered self, Boone's Pop-Tarts, and Hurley's chocolate-smeared mouth. "That's so gross, and fattening!"

"Who you callin' fat?" Hurley yelled from a corner.

"YOU!" Shannon screamed back.

"Jeez, dude! Don't have to be so... Harsh!" he said. "Mellow yourself down a bit, dude!"

"I! AM NOT! A DUDE!"

"Shannon, seriously," Boone said, trying to quiet her down. "Just go back to your seat, and we'll be there soon, as soon as we have all the food!"

"Stop trying to calm me down!" she said hysterically. "I will NOT be calmed down! I am _hysterical_! A hysterical blonde ditz with stick-like legs and a bad temper!"

"Dude, you just insulted yourself about twenty times," Hurley chuckled.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Shannon let out a strangled scream, the screamiest scream that has ever been screamed. Honestly, it was a pure miracle that the whole plane didn't explode from the sheer scream-osity of this said scream.

"What the CRAP, Sticks?" Sawyer yelled, after he took his fingers out of his ears. "What on EARTH posessed you to scream like that!"

"SOMETHING TOUCHED MY LLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEGGGGGGGGGGG!"

"Shh," Kate, um, shushed. "It was probably just a mouse, planes have those sometimes."

"You shouldn't have done that..." Boone put his fingers back into his ears.

"A MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUSSSSSE?! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKK!"

They quickly just packed the rest of the food into Kate's backpack, and left, leaving Shannon to stand there and scream. She eventually was found there by the security guards. The rest of them, however, made it back to their seats, all safe and sound.

Sawyer snacked on pie, because nobody else wanted the pastries that were stuffed down his shirt. Hurley finished his chocolate, almost all of Charlie's chicken, most of Boone's Pop-Tarts, and three bottles of Kate's lemonade. It was quite a party they had.

Eventually, however, they all fell asleep. They were landing in America before they knew it.

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**Ooh, America in the next chapter!**

**READ AND REVIEW!**

**CH Ming Diablo  
**


	10. Chapter 10: StirCrazy In A Terminal

Hurley: Dudes, she is so dude-sorry that this dudelicious chapter has been so dude long in coming... Dude.

Boone: On with the chapter!

Sawyer: Shut up, both of you.

**I don't own LOST!!!**

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**Chapter Ten: Stir-Crazy In A Terminal  
**

"DUDES, WE'RE LIKE LANDING IN DUDEMERICA!" Hurley screamed as the plane began descending. As he was sitting behind Sawyer, the back of Sawyer's head was almost completely covered in half Hurley-spit, half chocolate residue from the previous night.

Sawyer slowly turned around, glaring at Hurley, who looked sheepish. Sawyer then used his thumb and pointer finger to "thump" Hurley right in the center of his forehead.

"Did you just THUMP me?" Hurley yelled. This time it was the _front _of poor Sawyer's face that was covered in chocolate-spit.

"Yes," Sawyer said clearly through gritted teeth. "And if you don't shut your fat mouth, I'll do it again, and believe me... It won't be pretty." He was using his most threatening voice, and it worked magic on Hurley, who immediately sat back and buckled his seatbelt, trying to seem small and innocent.

Nobody was fooled.

"And anyway, Hurley, "Dudemerica" isn't a place," Kate said without turning around, for she was strapped into her seat. "It's actually called "America", if you didn't know."

"Do you think I'm stupid or something?" Hurley said indignantly. "I know _Dude_merica isn't a place, but we're landing in Dude York, right?" Kate felt the urgent need to facepalm.

"Ignore him..." Boone was saying to himself. "Ignore him..."

"SHUT UP, YOU FREAKING KIDS!" the stick lady that was supervising them screamed. "I mean... Um... Please be quiet, children. We will be landing in about ten minutes."

* * *

After exiting the plane, they went off to pick up their luggage. This was intended to be a quiet, peaceful time, intended for the kids to work off the dullness of sitting in a plane for hours on end, but it kind of turned into a free-for-all. I mean, come on. Did you really think that small, twig-like teacher could keep the likes of _Desmond, Sawyer, _and _Hurley _in line? I thought not.

"**MC DONALD'S**!!!" Hurley bellowed, dashing for the fast-food kiosk. Sayid saw a regiment of army men exit a plane, and sat, mesmerized by either the shiny medals on their uniforms or their guns. I'll give you one guess as to which one it was.

Shannon saw a floor-length mirror and began doing her makeup, Boone and Charlie laid in the middle of the hallway and began to sleep, having gotten no sleep in the last night, Kate made a wild run to a small coffee shop, Sawyer began threatening random people, mostly old ladies, and Jack was popping pills on top of a trashcan, because he had diagnosed himself as sick.

And we can't forget Desmond, who was frolicking in between people jostling through the terminal, singing the Barney themesong.

"CHILDREN!" their teacher kept screaming, to no avail. They just wouldn't listen. She finally grabbed a bullhorn from a redneck-looking man sitting next to her, and turned it on.

**"WOULD ANY CHILDREN ON THE NEW YORK SCHOOL TRIP PLEASE COME HERE." **They all came there, intimidated by the bullhorn.

"Jeez, lady, you didn't have to scream," Sawyer drawled. She gave him the skunk eye, which was pretty frightening, as her hair was sticking up all over the place, and her makeup was running.

"Do you need meds?" Jack asked, holding up his armful of pill bottles.

"Makeup?" Shannon offered.

"Coffee?" Kate questioned. When she heard the magic word, the teacher nodded furiously.

"Yes... Coffee would be good... Please..."

"All right," Sawyer said jovially, grabbing the cup of coffee and splashing it all over his teacher. This is when she finally snapped.

"BUS. NOW. NO QUESTIONS."

* * *

Hurley: The dude-author also apologizes for this chapter's dude shortness, dude.

Sawyer: *is wielding coffee*

Hurley: Um, I have to go, dudes.

**Review, please! XD**


	11. Chapter 11: Songness

**Look, another chapter! XD I'm on a roll!**

**I also don't own LOST. **

**

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**

**Chapter Eleven: Songness  
**

Boone was hoping that the bus ride to their hotel, located near Times Square, would be at least a _little _more peaceful then the plane ride.

Was he ever wrong.

He couldn't even quietly listen to his iPod to drown out everyone's loudness, simply because a few certain people (a.k.a. everyone on the bus) felt the need to share what _they_ were listening to in the most inconvenient manner.

"HOW COME EVERY TIME YOU COME AROUND MY LONDON, LONDON BRIDGE IS COMIN' DOWN...." Shannon sang loudly and obnoxiously from the seat behind him, while bobbing her head to her iPod. Boone knew from personal experience that his stepsister had no idea that she was tone-deaf, and thought that she had potential to be the next Pussycat Doll.

From beside Shannon, as they had the same seat buddies, Sayid was swinging his head around so fast, curly hair going everywhere, that Boone thought for sure that he was soon going to suffer from whiplash. And he was listening to screamo. And attempting to scream. It sounded like this.

"AAAAAAAAAAGH!"

In front of Boone, Sawyer was sitting by himself. How he managed _that_, Boone didn't care to know. But he _did _know that Sawyer was listening to something potentially embarassing. And singing along.

"Noddin' my head like yeahhhh... Movin' my hips like yeahhhh..." Sawyer sang, nodding and moving as Miley instructed. "I put my hands up, they're playin' my song, you know I'm gonna be O.K... Yeaaaaaaah, it's a party in the U.S.A.!" Boone snorted with laughter. He was lucky Sawyer was immersed in the song and didn't hear him.

In front of Sawyer, it was impossible not to hear Hurley. And what was he singing about? That's right, food.

"AND I EAT MY CANDY WITH THE PORK AND BEANS..."

As he was trying to block Hurley's audacious singing from reaching his ears, Boone couldn't help but wonder how candy with pork and beans could possibly be yummy. Well... In Hurley's eyes anything has the potential to be good.

Sitting beside Hurley, the stick-like teacher looked grossed out. Well, who could blame her?

From behind Shannon and Sayid, Boone only caught slight snatches of what Jack was singing. And it was kind of frightening when he heard it.

"I want a hippopotamus for Christmas... Only a hippopotamus will do..."

_Um, I wonder if Jack knows that it's only September, _Boone thought, confused.

And from beside Jack, like Hurley, it was impossible not to hear Desmond. He was still singing the Barney themesong at the top of his lungs. It was kind of amazing that no one had knocked him out or he hadn't lost his voice.

From behind the two of them, Charlie and Claire were both staring off into space, mouthing the words to the same song even though they weren't even sharing earbuds. It was kind of freaky.

And the girl beside Boone?

Kate was staring out of the window, singing under her breath. Boone took a second and tuned into the song she was mumbling.

"_Here's a song for the nights I think too much and here's a song when I imagine us together, here's a song for when we talk too much and I forget my words... Heaven can wait up high in the sky, it's you and I, heaven can wait deep down in your eyes I'm yours tonight... Lay your heart next to mine, I feel so alive... Tell me you want me to stay, forever, 'cause heaven can wait..._"

Boone grinned. At least there was one sane person on this trip.

* * *

**The songs...**

**Shannon: "London Bridge" by Fergie**

**Sayid: Random screamo song....**

**Sawyer: "Party In The U.S.A." by Miley Cyrus**

**Hurley: "Pork and Beans" by Weezer**

**Jack: "I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas"**

**Desmond: The Barney Themesong**

**Kate: "Heaven Can Wait" by We The Kings**

**REVIEW!**


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